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Monday, February 18, 2013

Body by Baby

Because Gisele and all her friends make it seem like stretchmarks don't happen, I started Body by Baby. Stretchmarks do happen. So does saggy skin. And saggy boobs. And that is ok. Because we are real women. Our bodies aren't perfect. But they didn't get this way on their own. They got this way because we are fucking awesome and CREATED A HUMAN IN THEM. What's a stretchmark or a muffin top when we actually made life?

This is what a real woman's belly looks like. This is what having beautiful babies does to a girl. And it is awesome:

This is Abby from Is This How Parenting Works?. She is the mom of a 1-year-old little girl.

Here is her story:
I'll be honest...I've had stretch marks since I was 15. They've just become a part of my thighs, hips and boobs. When I got pregnant, I knew for sure more would appear, despite any ridiculous creams or oils. For a long time, I didn't see any on my stomach. When my belly was so big that I couldn't see my toes, a friend of mine asked if I had gotten any stretch marks (bitch). I told her that apart from the ones already on my body, I hadn't gotten any new ones. Two months later, after my daughter was born, I discovered that my stomach looked like I had gotten into a fight with a bear and lost. Apparently there is one good part of being so big you can't tie your shoes or shave your vagina: you also don't get to see all of the new stretch marks formed all over your lower half. 

Thanks, Abby. You are the shit for sharing with us what we all hide from each other.

Feeling frisky? Send me your own Body by Baby portrait and I will share it with all six of my readers the world. Anonymously or not. Your choice. Email them to me at ilikebeerandbabies @ gmail .  com (remove spaces).


  1. LOL, I thought I hadn't gotten any during my first pregnancy either!! until the very last week when I stuck a mirror under the basketball. I was under no such illusions when pregnant with the twins.

  2. I too thought I didn't get them. The answer was: didn't get them on my stomach. Nope--got them on the under parts of my boobs!!! I learned about them at the post partum check. I guess that's what happens when hormones and new milk cause your body to go cuckoo.


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