Tuesday, May 6, 2014
Dear new mom,
Dear new mom,
I know you are having a hard time right now. I promise things will get easier soon.
Life is different now, but it won't always be this hard.
Your life has changed so vastly in such a short time that you sometimes wish that you had never gotten yourself into this situation. But I promise that it will get better. Very soon.
Though it currently feels like this will be your life for the rest of your life, it won't. You will start to get little glimmers of your old self back, little by little. One day soon you will have a sense of self again. And some self-esteem to boot.
I promise that the sleepless nights won't last forever. One day you will sleep through the night and wake up and run to your baby’s crib to make sure they are still alive because they slept all night.
Know that you are not the only one who looks at their baby and resents them sometimes.It is normal to not like your baby sometimes. You still love them, and that is all that matters.
Know that it is okay that you are sometimes annoyed by your baby’s constant needs. It is annoying. But necessary.
Fuck the perfect Pinterest mommies who seem to have it all together. They don't. They cry themselves to sleep every once in a while just like you do.
Also, those people who keep telling you to enjoy every minute of this precious time? They are assholes. Don't sweat the days where you feel like you didn't do enough with your baby or that you didn't create life altering Disney-esque memories. There will be plenty of time for that in the future. Right now just try to get through the day without nut-punching your partner. I know that that is a task within itself.
Right now there is a good chance that you resemble a sea hag who is covered in spit up. Don't worry, you will be pretty again. You may not ever get back to the former self you remember, but you will be better. You will be stronger on the inside and that is what makes you beautiful. What's a few extra pounds or a stretch mark here or there when you have given and sustained life?
If you are now a stay-at-home mom who feels like she will never have a life outside of her kids again, let that go. Once you get your feet back on the ground, you will make new friends and rekindle friendships with old ones. You just have to accept that the friendships may take on a new form.
And if you are back to work and wondering why you even bothered having kids when you barely get to see them anyway, don’t worry, that feeling will go away. I know you feel like both a crap employee and a crap mom right now, but you are neither.
No matter what kind of mom you are, just be patient and kind to yourself until the tides turn. Trust me, they will. Eventually.
Being a mom will always be hard, but it will get easier. I promise. Little by little, day by day.
And remember, no one is as harsh of a critic about how you are as a mom as your are on yourself.
You are doing a great job.
Just hang in there, mama. You got this.
If you share this post, I will buy you a pony. I suck at Twitter. I am OK at Facebook. Pinterest is my bitch. I am also on Bloglovin' and Instagram.