Image Map

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Postpartum Porn

So if you live under some sort of pregnancy rock and have not heard of the hilariousness that is Pregnant Chicken, you must check it out. She just featured the most awesomeness of posts: Porn for Pregnant Ladies.

This post got me thinking of what would turn me on while I am stuck in the hell that is postpartum phase. Such as ADD Daddy saying:


  • Let me take the baby tonight. You just relax and get some sleep. You deserve it.
  • I love your hysterical crying. It just reminds me of how much of a woman you really are.
  • Six weeks isn't that long. Besides, I already dream of making love to you every night.
  • Let's order Thai food and obsess over the color and consistency of the baby's bowel movements.
  • Those aren't stretch marks. Those are battle scars because you are a warrior. A sexy warrior.
  • Let me get you another ice pack. I know your hemorrhoids must be killing you and I hate to see you in pain.
  • Tonight I just want you to rub your feet while you lay on the couch, hold the baby while it sleeps and watch reruns of True Blood.
  • I didn't think it was possible, but you are actually sexier than you were before you got pregnant.
  • That's not baby weight. It's just more of you to love.


19 comments:

  1. The Ryan Reynolds one is the best. And I think if Brad Pitt said that to me, I would probably swoon over dead.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I came to your blog through "People I want to Punch in the Throat" and this post is hilarious!! I am so glad I came by for a visit! Love it!

    Jennifer
    www.pletcher5journey.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think that would work as porn for a mother of children of any age. Or just any woman for that matter.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This is fantastic! I love your blogs name too. Stopping by from PIWTPITT. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love, love, love this and shared it with all my moms friends. Who are consequently sharing it as well!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. OMG Thank you to PIWTPITT for sending me to you. Love it!!!! Love the True Blood one the most :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Lol ok, my hubby has actually told me I'm sexier now than before pregnancy. As if waiting 6 weeks wasn't excruciating enough.

    ReplyDelete
  8. My baby is turning 10 on Sunday but these guys still do it for me. You picked every hot guy of my dreams. Beer and Babies, is there anything else?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Excellent! Clive is my fave.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thank you for the laugh. Awesome Post.

    ReplyDelete
  11. There are many of them at the moment, but some men are addicted to elite escorts and look for them as their only source of income. At the moment, there are a lot of calls coming from young women, and some of them are suffering from talented qualities and trials that they try to give a lot of pleasure to. Likewise, you would love to see hot female escorts Lahore that restrict you to your liking. Escorts Service Lahore includes all the places you can't even imagine. If you want young women around the world to call you, we can help.

    ReplyDelete
  12. The offer of Karachi Escorts will ensure that your safety and privacy is also our first priority. The call girls in Karachi are from Pakistan Nightclub Karachi and the multilingual also ensures that you will be able to communicate fast and well. escort service Karachi agency provides, Elite Model, Pakistani Actress, Cute, Adult, Teacher, Shy, Housewife, College Students, and University Girls etc. all the sexy girls are available in Karachi with Different Rates Our Starting Price 25,000 to 50,000.

    ReplyDelete
  13. The sexual administration of Islamabad that we present through our administration is amazingly beautiful. You are spending your money to meet the skirts and you have to make sure that you are meeting the most attractive skirts towards the end of the day. At the moment you can move forward with our Islamabad call girls no organization, you will have the option to meet with such sexual management in Islamabad with fewer problems.

    ReplyDelete
  14. A few reasons why adults prefer to see porn are given below: Free mature porn

    ReplyDelete
  15. You there, this is really good post here. Thanks for taking the time to post such valuable information. Quality content is what always gets the visitors coming. whiskey

    ReplyDelete

I love hearing from you. It reinforces that writing this blog is not just a silly waste of my brain matter. If you leave a douche canoe comment, I will delete it. I am powerful like that.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...