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Monday, January 14, 2013

Body by Baby

Because Gisele and all her friends make it seem like stretchmarks don't happen, I started Body by Baby. Stretchmarks do happen. So does saggy skin. And saggy boobs. And that is ok. Because we are real women. Our bodies aren't perfect. But they didn't get this way on their own. They got this way because we are fucking awesome and CREATED A HUMAN IN THEM. What's a stretchmark or a muffin top when we actually made life?

This is what a real woman's belly looks like. This is what having beautiful babies does to a girl. And it is awesome:

Lori says the tattoo is a volcano, that erupted when she got pregnant...

This is Lori from The Next Step. Lori is the mom of three girls:

"The Kid" is 5, in kindergarten, and our little miracle after a miscarriage and some significant trying. 

The Twins will be 3 in March, and were a big surprise. We wanted to give The Kid a sibling, and got two. Everyone asks if there are twins in our families and the answer is "no". The Dr. chalked it up to "AMA" - Advanced Maternal Age and said the body pushes out more eggs the older you get. I said, "Like rats off a sinking ship?" and she said, "Yeah, kinda like that."

Thanks, Lori. You are the shit for sharing with us what we all hide from each other.

Feeling frisky? Send me your own Body by Baby portrait and I will share it with all six of my readers the world. Anonymously or not. Your choice. Email them to me at ilikebeerandbabies @ gmail .  com (remove spaces).


  1. Rats off a sinking ship. Hahaha!

  2. A-freaking-men! While I didn't get stretch mark - parts of my body sure as hell aren't where they are supposed to be. I suppose full frontals aren't want you are look for on this blog though so I will spare you the saggy-ness! New follower here. Love the blog :)

  3. FEEL FREE to grab my half naked pics off my blog. I don't have lots O stretch marks that are visible, that's mostly because I'm still 30 pounds overweight and I think they're just still all smoothed out by the extra poundage.

    Kids are lucky they're so cute. If they came out looking like Uncle Fester I'm pretty sure none of us would be so cavalier about the post baby body.

  4. I'm glad you shared this picture of Lori! I had stretch marks before I was pregnant and now I have a few more. I like my tiger stripes :)


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