Here is how Monkey Joe's describes itself: Bring your kids to Monkey Joe's fun-filled inflatable play center! Our wall-to-wall inflatable slides, jumps, and obstacle courses will keep your kids active, happy, and healthy.
Here is how I describe Monkey Joe's: the 5th circle of hell. For those of you not familiar, the 5th circle is the one where those who commit wrath and sloth go to. Monkey Joe's fills me with wrath and the place was basically a pit ravaged by Ebola and other disgusting kid diseases, so it seems apropro on the sloth front.
Here is the Monkey Joe's breakdown for kids:
take off their shoes.
enter blown up pits of snot and fungus protected only by a thin layer of sock.
jump up and down in said sloth-pit until you lose the ability to stand.
go to a private party room (not as dirty as it sounds).
regain stamina and want to bounce some more.
Here is the Monkey Joe's breakdown for parents:
watch kids jump up and down in germ cesspools.
try to make idle small talk with other parents.
want to die.
go to private party room (much dirtier than it sounds).
watch kids eat cake.
drag kids kicking and screaming to the car when it is time to leave.
lose will to live.
My kid getting taken out by another kid, AKA, how Monkey Joe's rolls.
I was lucky enough to be the parent with the kid that climbed to the top of the tallest blow up slide only to
Needless to say, I hate Monkey Joe's. Also needless to say, The Contemplator loves it and can't wait to go back. Balls.