Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Sexism: not just an old-timey myth.


The other day, I was watching mindless TV when Family Feud came on. I usually love Family Feud because Steve Harvey is my spirit animal. Or at least I thought he was. Turns out, Steve Harvey is a fat shaming, sexist asshole. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement. I thought Steve was a TV personality for the people. A man who used humor and a great sense of timing to lighten the world up a bit and give us a laugh when we needed it. Well, I am not sure I feel that way anymore...

So what did Steve do that has my panties in such a bunch? Well, you see, Steve dissed my homegirl, Oprah. The question on the Family Feud board was, “Name something you don’t want to see Oprah wear?” Um, what the fuck, Steve? Seriously? What did you think the answers to that were going to be? A parka? Roller skates? Anything other than sexist, fat shaming bullshit? I think not. 

Here are the top answers that the wonderful people polled came up with:

Sorry, I had a rage stroke before I could take a picture of the last two but don’t worry, they were equally offensive.


Let’s go over the amazingly offensive answers, shall we?

1. Bikini/swimsuit
Um, yeah. People tend to wear these things. When swimming. Hence the name SWIMsuit. It isn’t like Oprah was going to be running around Whole Foods in a string bikini. Sorry, O. We're going to need you to swim in a scuba suit from now on, apparently. 

2. Lingerie/thong: 
I imagine the only person that would be seeing Ms. Winfrey in these types of garments would be that stud, Stedman. So no worries there, either.

3. Nothing
Again, for Stedman’s eyes only, y’all. Unless Oprah is going to start her own nudie beach. If so, I am so in!

4. Catsuit/leopard: 
What. The. Fuck? Is O going to take up hooking or something? I mean, I am pretty sure she is doing OK financially and all…

5. Tank/haltertop: 
This is the year 2015. Who the fuck says haltertop still?

6. Miniskirt: I think the Divine Ms. O could straight rock a mini and some Jimmy’s. Just sayin’.

Why on earth is this question OK? Would you say, “Name something you don’t want to see Dr. Phil wear?” No, because fat shaming a man isn’t “funny”. Also, Oprah is about 1% away from being a saint in most people’s book. Why do we have to talk about what we don’t want to see her wearing? Is it all of the charity she does? What a bitch. Is it all of the positive self esteem she creates in women, no matter how they look? The nerve! Is it that she is one of the most powerful people in the world and she happens to have a vagina? No. It couldn’t be!

Want to even the playing field? How about we ask the same question only insert “Steve Harvey” where “Oprah” is. Because I REALLY don’t want to see your ass in any of those things either, Steve.

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