Tuesday, June 12, 2012

The Confessional

For the last 20-something years, my mom has kept up the ruse that my old dog, Shelby, actually was one dog in the history of the world to be taken to live on a farm. Finally, last month, I was able to get her to admit that Shelby was, instead, hit by a car. My mom would even elaborate the lie with who owned the farm, the goats Shelby would play with, how much she liked to run there, etc. Busted!

The Confessional is now open. Have something you need to repent for? Feel free to send me your sin and I will help your purge your demons.

1 comment:

  1. A couple of things here. 1. My college roommate got rid of her cat, Fatty (a name TOTALLY deserved, biggest fucking cat I've ever seen, AND woke me up at 6 a.m. to be fed - NO BUENO - when roomie was out being a whore I mean "being social") and said he went to go live on a farm, which in fact, he really DID. Then, when she checked on him with the farm owner, found out that he ran away and never came back. So who really knows what the hell happened there.
    2. I don't know. I said "a couple of things" and I lost my train of thought. Thanks, rum and diet coke.


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