I have learned that with my toddler, three is the magic number. By this, I mean that in order to get her to do anything she doesn't want to or stop doing anything she does want to but isn't supposed to, I need to tell her three times, with increasing levels of intensity. It reminds me of my Mommy Tolerance Threshold. Whether it is asking her to pony up the cereal she found under the couch because it is time for dinner, or telling her to stop sticking the keys in the light socket, I can never get her to react on the first request.
Me: Quiet Contemplator, it's time for bed. Let's put on your jammies.
The Quiet Contemplator: Plays deaf and continues to build a robot out of Mega Bloks.
Me: Quiet Contemplator, I said it was time to put on your jammies so please come here. Now.
The Quiet Contemplator: Continues to play deaf and resumes her Bloks play, though she has now switched to building a doggie.
Me: QUIET CONTEMPLATOR! Put the fucking Bloks down and get your ass over here and in these jammies before I have an aneurysm! (I don't actually say this but MY GOD do I want to.)
What I really say is more like: QUIET CONTEMPLATOR. JAMMIES. NOW.
The Quiet Contemplator: Puts the Bloks down and slowly pads her way over to me like nothing happened.
Now, on the other hand, if I ask The Quiet Contemplator to do something she likes, like go to the park or eat a cupcake, she could hear that shit whispered from space.
These two qualities may have caused me to have a slight eye twitch and drinking problem.