- Why did no one tell me that my boobs would be bigger than Dolly Parton's and squirt milk whenever I even think about the baby?
- How on earth can the baby be hungry? I just fed it 20 minutes ago.
- Why is the baby pooping so much? It subsists on a strictly liquid diet.
- How is it possible that something so tiny is so loud?
- Why does the baby sleep all day and stay up all night? Was it in a rock band while in the womb? Should I be concerned about drugs?
- Why in the hell did I decide having a baby was a good idea?
- Is it wrong that I dream about a time when my life was filled with cheap chardonnay and expensive shoes, not cheap haircuts and expensive diapers?
- Is it just me, or is my baby an a$$hole?
- Is it wrong that i think my baby is an a$$hole? Does that make me a bad mom?
- Where is the vodka?
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
10 Questions About Baby's First Week
An email from WebMD that I thought deserved my interpretation. Though theirs was mainly questions about how to prevent SIDS and other scary schmidt, I thought these were equally important: